On-Plane Wedding Update
August 21st, 2005
I have a strong inner core and understanding of what’s “proper”. Behavior, social expectations, etc. There are certain things you do, and certain things you do not do when someone is celebrating their wedding (of course, usually I ignore them, but that’s another story). It’ all well and good to call the bride beautiful, the groom handsome, the reception great, the food remarkable, but to use such adjectives is to reduce their worth through repetition. Practically everyone’s going to be doing that, after all. It’s… expected.
So with that windup: This weekend was amazing. The whole thing, at least from the perspective of an attendee, seemed so… simple. It’s like all the world’s problems decided to pull back and show that even among their myriad complexities it is the simplicity of the whole that matters. Anyone who has ever been in a relationship can witness to the ebbs and tides thereof, the many problems and joys that come with it. It’s never the same twice, after all, and expands to encompass not one world, but the world of both persons. And yet these two worlds, the infinite mazes and possibilities that can be found there, are summed up in a single word.
It’s not the parts that matter. It’s the whole. And this weekend drew a thick, engraved, embossed triple underscore underneath that assertion.
For myself, it began with the drive up to the ceremony, an hour of open-window cruising through thick maine forest. The weather, the trees, the moisture in the air brought up connections to my childhood so powerful that even now I cannot truly perceive the importance of the problems I am flying back to face. My normal open dialogue with myself fell silent, the everactive synapses in my brain shut down, and I was caught up in the novel experience of perceiving nothing but the here-and-now.
That hour alone was worth the trip.
I arrived at the ceremony an hour early, end practically no-one was there. So I decided to leave again, drove around Ellsworth for a bit, and somehow the managed to maintain the magic. When I finally made it back I soon came across the crowd from THEM, and with much joking and commentary about the provided Heuristics we caught up and chatted. I’m afraid I might’ve talked a little too much, but then, that’s just me. For some reason, there was something relaxing even in this. I wasn’t trying to impress anyone, had no expectations. It’s a different crowd from the Pittsburgh Gaming group, a group of very mature individuals whose lives have seperated, but who have still kept the social connections of Friendship. Once again, the simplicity of the word belies its complexity, and yet I was unable to perceive anything but the whole.
That experience alone was worth the trip.
So far, this post has been about my experiences, because the couple so far had not really entered into the picture. This of course changed with the ceremony. It was short. It was simple. And while I am a big fan of overloading on the pomp and circumstance, the noise of all the extras would have tried to construct an artificial wonder around something that needs no such embellishment. The message was simple: Two people, Alyssa and Konrad, have found each other in this crazy world, have found the simplicity behind the chaos, and wanted to share their discovery: Love.
It is amazing that we should suffer so much fear and doubt, for such a simple thing. It’s all well and good to say that it’s simple- it is quite another to realize it… and that’s all I can really say about that.
That message alone was worth the trip.
Regarding the reception. To say the environment was beautiful is… ignorant. Standing on the lawn and looking across the lake one can feel the pulse of memories made and cherished, a world unto its own with worth beyond imagining. Not only that, but here we all were, asked, invited, encouraged to help make another memory to add to that canvas. Right here, right now, the tapestry of life surrounding us, the strands weaving themselves into yet another simplicity.
This Honor, itself, was worth the trip.
And now, we come to the last part: This update. I would be lying if I said this weekend was fully consumed by deep, encompassing realizations. In fact, it is only now when I drink in the entire experience that I have made them. I’ve had doubts, I’ve had my share of bitter thoughts, I’ve even entertained spite for a moment this weekend. But the memories are there, and now they are tinged with joy because of this post. Because I have taken the time to step back, smile, and confront the core of distaste that is so often thrown at things. And in that confrontation, I have found simplicity.
And that, itself, was worth the trip.
Thank you.
Signed,
Michael
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