<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?>
<rss version="2.0"
	xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/"
	xmlns:wfw="http://wellformedweb.org/CommentAPI/"
	xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/"
	xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom"
	xmlns:sy="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/syndication/"
	xmlns:slash="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/slash/"
	>

<channel>
	<title>Krotscheck.net &#187; funny</title>
	<atom:link href="http://www.krotscheck.net/tag/funny/feed" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://www.krotscheck.net</link>
	<description>Michael Krotscheck's insights, ideas, and inspirations about web technology, life, and the kitchen sink.</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Fri, 03 Feb 2012 05:10:42 +0000</lastBuildDate>
	<language>en</language>
	<sy:updatePeriod>hourly</sy:updatePeriod>
	<sy:updateFrequency>1</sy:updateFrequency>
	<generator>http://wordpress.org/?v=</generator>
		<item>
		<title>Couch to Marathon</title>
		<link>http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/09/20/couch-to-marathon.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/09/20/couch-to-marathon.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Sep 2008 21:06:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael Krotscheck</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[10K]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[5K]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bloopers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Half-marathon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marathon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[running]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/09/20/couch-to-marathon.html</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You have no idea how long I&#8217;ve been itching to write this post. The idea for it came into my head&#8230; oh, about 6 months ago, when it looked very likely that I was going to achieve what everyone&#8217;s told me not to: Go from the Couch to running a Marathon in less than a [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>You have no idea how long I&#8217;ve been itching to write this post. The idea for it came into my head&#8230; oh, about 6 months ago, when it looked very likely that I was going to achieve what everyone&#8217;s told me not to: Go from the Couch to running a Marathon in less than a year.</p>
<p>A little background: 11 months ago (almost exactly) I decided that it&#8217;d be neat to start running a little. My regular cardiovascular sport at that time was inline skating, which I did with gusto&#8230; yet unfortunately skates don&#8217;t do too well in wet or snowy conditions. So rather than shift over to a weight training program like I usually do during the winter months I decided to &#8220;pick up&#8221; running. At that point in time the idea that I would one day run a Marathon was still somewhere between WTF and Crazy Talk, but a quick 5K seemed like a good goal to achieve.</p>
<p>What a ride (err&#8230; run) it has been! Through injuries, lost faith and motivation, accidental beer binges (long story) and seeming setbacks, I finally made it through to complete my first Marathon today. I had to learn a lot of things about what my body would put up with (less than I thought), had to explore much my body can take (more than I thought), and had to laugh about a lot of things I couldn&#8217;t change (which somehow increased the hilarity).</p>
<p>Now let me reiterate what others have told me: This approach to marathon running is not recommended, and you should always consult a medical professional before you do something of this magnitutde. I think I only got away with it because I&#8217;d already done a lot of regular cardio and as a result was pretty healthy. That, and I&#8217;m colossally stubborn and am a firm believer in Mind over Body.</p>
<p>Having said that, if anyone wants to follow in my footsteps (remember: bad idea), here&#8217;s the training plans I used:</p>
<ol>
<li><a href="http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.shtml" target="_blank">Couch-to-5K Running Plan</a><br />
  This plan is unlike others because it doesn&#8217;t slowly build up distance, it instead assumes that any human being can walk 30 minutes. It then starts injecting short periods of running into that 30 minutes, and after a few iterations of increasing the duration stitches them all together into one continuous effort&#8230; which happens to be 30 minutes of continuous running. If you&#8217;re running a 10 minute mile (a respectable pace) this&#8217;ll get you your 5K.</p>
</li>
<li><a href="http://www.marathontraining.com/marathon/m_mile.html" target="_blank">Mileage Buildup Plan</a><br />
  At this point, you can easily run 3 miles on a regular basis, and you&#8217;ll quickly realize that extending it by another mile is a lot less effort than you might think (This is why many long-distance runners are fairly blase about anything less than 18). The reason I took on this plan was because I liked running enough to make it a regular thing, but not enough to really start training for a major race. With a 10-mile regular run as the final goal, I figured I&#8217;d be set to try something if the mood struck me.</p>
</li>
<li><a href="http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-238-244--6851-2-2X5X8-4,00.html" target="_blank">Half Marathon Training Plan</a><br />
  Peer pressure finally won over and I decided to do a race. This particular plan came up on Google, so I switched to it in the middle of the previous plan because I thought it&#8217;d be a neat thing to do. Fact is I was kinda sick of running without a concrete goal or race (the 5K actually had me run two races) so it came at just the right time.</p>
</li>
<li><a href="http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-238-244-255-6946-0,00.html" target="_blank">Marathon Training Plan</a><br />
  Unfortunately, I got injured during the Half training, so I ended up volunteering instead (For details, see the &#8220;Stupid Shit I Did&#8221; section below). After going through a few weeks of recovery (and let me tell you, endorphin withdrawal really, really sucks), my colleague Hanna mentioned that she was thinking of training for the USAF Marathon, and&#8230; well, by this time I&#8217;d caught the bug. So off I go to look for a marathon training plan, and wouldn&#8217;t you know it: This one actually started one week from the day I started searching.</li>
</ol>
<h3>Things to think about</h3>
<p>First of all, remember that you need to be very candid with yourself about both your time availability and your commitment to running. Yes, a Marathon is the most fantastifrabulous goals of all of them (so much that I think we should replace the electoral college with a cross-country relay), but if your actual goal is just getting healthier and working on your endurance and cardiovascular system, a regular running regime will do you just fine.</p>
<p>Secondly, once you get up to the longer distances you will realize that running is <em>painful&#8230;</em> at least for the beginner. Mostly this is because you and your body haven&#8217;t quite come to terms yet on the equipment, the schedule, the distance or the fact that you&#8217;re doing this in the first place, but remember that long-distance-running is an endurance sport, which means enduring exhaustion, pain, injury and all kinds of other nastiness to get to your goal. Alternatively, you can just keep in mind that the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheidippides" target="_blank">first guy who ran one</a>&#8230; died. How&#8217;s that for a reality check.</p>
<p>But most of all, and this is absolutely critical: Be resilient and proactive about bad stuff that happens- the worst thing you can do is ignore something that&#8217;s not going well, because it&#8217;ll derail you quickly. There&#8217;s no point in being a martyr when a little education and a little trip to the pharmacy will set you straight.</p>
<p>Having said that, most of the other advice I have to give I&#8217;m not really qualified for, so go forth and Google. The only things I am perfectly happy sharing with you is the blooper reel, which shall be titled:</p>
<h3>Stupid Shit I Did Which You Shouldn&#8217;t</h3>
<ol>
<li>I bought my first pair of shoes online, without fitting them. As a web geek, it&#8217;s really easy to trust the sizes provided to you by a retailer, but nothing&#8230; I mean NOTHING will screw your feet up faster than a pair of shoes that&#8217;s not right for you. A running shoe has a very different fit from something you&#8217;ll wear to the office.</li>
<li>I thought I&#8217;d be all kinds of awesome and, rather than take rest days, repeat the previous day&#8217;s training regimen so that I&#8217;d be running every day and thus get fitter, faster. This, combined with the shoe issue and my own naivite, lead to&#8230;</li>
<li>&#8230;the fact that I didn&#8217;t realize I was getting shin splints, and thus ignored them, resulting in the injury mentioned above. Splints are actually a fairly common problem with me, and is usually the sign to get a new set of shoes or switch to the other pair, but in this case was just a matter of me having absolutely no clue about all the pitfalls that could befall runners. Verdict? Stress fracture in my left shin, and I was out for the count.</li>
<li>I thought it&#8217;d be an incredibly bright idea to explore a new running trail for one of my important major long runs (the 18 miler, second to last). Most of my running up until that point was in fairly easy suburban trails, so heading out to a brand new place to explore a new exciting trail&#8230; which turned out to be incredibly hilly and a royal pain in the posterior&#8230; was maybe not the best thing to do.</li>
<li>And lastly, I forgot vaseline for the Marathon itself. No, I&#8217;m not finishing that story.</li>
</ol>
]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/09/20/couch-to-marathon.html/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>13</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>April Fools Day!</title>
		<link>http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/04/01/april-fools-day.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/04/01/april-fools-day.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:40:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael Krotscheck</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[aprilfools]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.krotscheck.net/?p=2084</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I haven&#8217;t felt inspired to post much recently, largely because work&#8217;s been kindof crazy, but given that it&#8217;s April Fools Day I&#8217;m going to come out of my hole long enough to do my traditional &#8220;April Fools Day&#8221; collection. The rules? Simple: If you come across a good April fools day joke, post it in [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I haven&#8217;t felt inspired to post much recently, largely because work&#8217;s been kindof crazy, but given that it&#8217;s April Fools Day I&#8217;m going to come out of my hole long enough to do my traditional &#8220;April Fools Day&#8221; collection. The rules? Simple: If you come across a good April fools day joke, post it in the comments and I&#8217;ll add it to the list.</p>
<p>Lets get started, shall we?</p>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.google.com/virgle/">Google &amp; Virgin Atlantic Partner to Colonize Mars!</a></li>
<li><a href="http://mail.google.com/mail/help/customtime/index.html">Gmail Custom Time: Send email even in the past!</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.worldofwarcraft.com/moltencore/">World of Warcraft comes to Consoles in Molten Core!</a></li>
<li><a href="http://a.viary.com/blog/dodo">Aviary Dodo: What You’ll Look Like in 25 Years</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.infoworld.com/article/08/04/01/14FE-april-fool-microsoft-yahoo_1.html">Microsoft and Yahoo agree on buyout price.</a></li>
<li><a href="http://technology.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/tech_and_web/article3656103.ece">SniffU releases Facebook application to physically locate mobile users.</a></li>
<li><a href="http://daily.mahalo.com/2008/04/01/md090-steve-jobs-interview/">Maladay interviews Steve Jobs.</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/betamaxhd.html">ThinkGeek: Betamax to HD-DVD Converter</a></li>
<li><a href="http://thepiratebay.org/blog/102">PirateBay moving operations to Sinai Desert</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/google_dreamads.php">ReadWriteWeb: Sneak Peek at Google Dream Ads</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.google.com/googlecalendar/new_wakeup.html">Google Calendar Wake Up Kit</a></li>
<li><a href="http://docs.google.com/Edit?docID=dhk5p2gc_21gwt3trt7">Google Documents: Create a new Airplane</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.engadget.com/2008/04/01/greenhouses-absurd-8x-optical-zoom-kit-for-cameraphones/">Engadget: Optical Zoom lens for mobile devices</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/">Every Featured Video on youtube is a rick roll.</a></li>
</ul>
<p>You know, sometimes I really underestimate the power of the social web. For instance, this one man&#8217;s poor efforts pale in comparison to the collation happening over at <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/April_1%2C_2008">wikipedia</a>.</p>
<p></p>
]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.krotscheck.net/2008/04/01/april-fools-day.html/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Weekend in review</title>
		<link>http://www.krotscheck.net/2006/03/19/weekend-in-review.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.krotscheck.net/2006/03/19/weekend-in-review.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 19 Mar 2006 23:09:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael Krotscheck</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[party]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stupid]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://127.0.0.1:83/2006/03/19/weekend-in-review.html</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Having left my car at the embassy (I had <em>serious</em> balance issues) Karl was nice enough to give me a ride to my place, where I happily crashed for… a total of 5 hours, at which time my internal clock reminded me why I hated it. Fine- still a bit tipsy, working on a hangover, the first thing I did was rehydrate as fast as possible, which seems to have mitigated the worst of it. Happy that I wasn’t feeling as crappy as I did before, I head off via public transportation to go collect my car in chilly, but sunny weather. As I finally got off the bus on Wightman and headed towards my car, I reached for my keys…</p>]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It’s been one of those weekends.</p>
<p>Friday, on a bit of a whim, I decided to take a long lunch and ended up at Mullaney’s with Chaos, Kelli and Aleris. A few beers, good conversation, good food… no sitting room, sadly, but the music was great, and I realized that a pint of Smithwick’s made me so ridiculously productive for the rest of the day that I’m going to try this ‘Take an hour for lunch to recharge’ thing in this next week to see if it affects my productivity. Up until now I’ve worked through lunch to save time, but I suspect the relaxation time had something to do with it.</p>
<p>That night I joined the Embassy Bar Crawl on Ellsworth. We started at the Harris Grill, which I thoroughly enjoyed. After that we wandered by Infinity… which I will never go to again, and sat down at the Soba Lounge, which in my eyes looked like the kind of establishment that I’m going to have to learn to enjoy, but don’t have to like. It’s Yuppie heaven in there, and while there were very attractive women all over the place, after having a conversation with a few I realized they genuine-to-golddigger ratio in there was way out of proportion for my taste. It’s the place you go to rub elbows with people who will be valuable networking contacts in the future. Anyway, after that we head to Bites and Brews, where we had a great time, and then ended up back at the Harris grill while we arranged for rides back home.</p>
<p>Total intake for that evening: 4 pints, 4 long islands. 4 hours.</p>
<p>Having left my car at the embassy (I had <em>serious</em> balance issues) Karl was nice enough to give me a ride to my place, where I happily crashed for… a total of 5 hours, at which time my internal clock reminded me why I hated it. Fine- still a bit tipsy, working on a hangover, the first thing I did was rehydrate as fast as possible, which seems to have mitigated the worst of it. Happy that I wasn’t feeling as crappy as I did before, I head off via public transportation to go collect my car in chilly, but sunny weather. As I finally got off the bus on Wightman and headed towards my car, I reached for my keys…</p>
<p>…and realized they were still at home. In the apartment. Which was locked.</p>
<p>Right. So the plans for the rest of the day were <em>supposed</em> to be me trying out my new blades on the morewood lot, go see a matinee of V, then head to an advanced Jitterbug Lesson and Swing Cafe afterwards. Instead, I ended up at the Embassy watching Avalon (good movie), then joined them for the aforementioned matinee (great movie), then joined a large crew at Friday’s for long-not-had hangout time with all those peeps (I rarely see them anymore, and am glad for that time). JE was nice enough to take me back by my place so I could break into my apartment (scaling the outside of three floors worth of balcony, WOOT!), and then we head back to his place ofr a relaxed chill-out-with-beer gettogether, which I bowed out early from because my body finally said: “So… you just scaled the outside of a building on a hangover and 5 hours of sleep. What were you thinking? <em>THWAP</em>”</p>
<p>Oh man, 12 hours of sleep never felt so good.</p>
<p>Anyway, today was homework and filing more of the papers that were strewn across my floor (I’m doing the pre-spring-cleaning organizing right now), watching a few movies, writing a really, really, really long email back to Julie (whose conversations require somewhere on the order of 3+ hours to think through), and now kicking back with a bit of caffiene, a bit of something to eat, and photoshop to work on my sister’s website while I idly wait for a good enough time to head out to Salsa.</p>
<p>Yeah… it was one of <em>those</em> weekends. It was good. It included surprises, good times, good relaxation, good introspection, good emotions, good friends, and just in general a good time.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.krotscheck.net/2006/03/19/weekend-in-review.html/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
	</channel>
</rss>

